DWTS: Wax on! Wax off! (And splat.)

By | April 25, 2011

Chron Entertainment

Guilty pleasures week! Which is the entirety of this show, really, isn’t it?

Somehow, ousted Idol singer Pia Toscano is involved in all this. Not sure if I’d want to be dubbed a “guilty pleasure” this early in my career. But hey, a gig is a gig (is a dancing boyfriend).

Hanson! MMMBop! (I hope Andrew Dansby is watching this.) Even the pro dancers are supremely cheesy tonight.

Speaking of …

Kirstie Alley & Maksim Chmerikovsky: (samba, 26) Oh baybay, baybay. I’m digging Kirstie tonight. The old sparkle is back, and she glides across the floor with authority. Just the right amount of cha-cha. (Also? Britney doesn’t even dance like that anymore.)

And can I say “bonus” house band Hanson should be installed permanently? And record an album of guilty pleasure tunes?

Chris Jericho & Cheryl Burke: (tango, 22) Wait, Jericho is in a heavy metal band named Fozzy? And is now dancing to Journey? This is like some sort of guilty pleasure black hole.

I’d never normally worry about Jericho bringing the aggression, but something isn’t clicking tonight. There’s just not enough movement or intensity. It feels clipped, a bit clumsy and, after the last few weeks, disappointing.

Romeo & Chelsie Hightower: (waltz, 28) I still remember the SOBBING masses of moviegoers when I went to see Titanic. (I’LL NEVER LET GO, JACK.) This dance wasn’t quite as emotional, but it was really lovely. A few parts needed some smoothing out, but nothing major. Who knew Romeo was such a romantic?

And we have the first 10 of the season! (Celine Dion chest thump.)

Chelsea Kane & Mark Ballas: (quick step, 28) I wasn’t as delirious over this as the judges. The beginning seemed clumsy, and I wasn’t crazy about the geek motif. Same score as Romeo, who I think was better. (But what do I know?)

Kendra Wilkinson & Louis Van Amstel: (samba, 25) WHOAWHOAWHOA. This was dangerously close to Super XXXVIII territory. But you know what? It was also her best to date. Finally, Kendra makes use of her best assets. Hef would be proud.

Hines Ward & Kym Johnson: (Viennese waltz, 27) I love me some Hines. He’s the most consistent of all the celebrities, ridiculously likable and practically a shoo-in for the finals at this point. He glides through this dance with an effortless charm.

And shut it, Carrie Ann Inaba.

Ralph Macchio & Karina Smirnoff: (paso doble, 24) Wax on! Wax off! And SPLAT.

Karina eats it early in the dance, thrown to the floor by her own twirl and Ralph’s coattail. That was no lightweight fall. She seems completely frazzled for a bit, but they power through like champs. It makes Kirstie’s trip-ups seem like nothing. Ouch.

Lots of good stuff tonight. But I think Jericho might be bodyslammed out of the ring. What do you think?

DWTS airs at 7 p.m. Mondays and 8 p.m. Tuesdays on ABC.

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